As I enter the room with me head hanging low, I find an empty seat in circle of chairs next to no one. It's my first meeting and really don't want to be here. The meeting starts and it is my turn.
Hello, My name is Homersimpsonrules, and it has been almost four months since my last blog.
Everyone in the room gasps. Then repeats, HI, Homersimpsonrules.
I being to cry.
The person next to me takes my hand as I wipe away my tears with the back of my hand. I am crying so hard that my nose starts to run and I then wipe my nose with the back of my hand.
I start out by saying, I promised myself that I would blog at least every week if not more. I know that I have not been a good blogger but can you all forgive me.
The person sitting across from me in the circle passes me a roll of T.P.
and tells me that they will all forgive me.
I wipe my face with the toilet paper (that is 3-ply and smells like roses).
The meeting seems to take forever. Once all the loser bloggers tell their stories. By the end of the three hour meeting I am sweating in my knee pits, and my gum had dissolved in my mouth from chewing it so fast and too long. I am starting to think that this whole blogger anonymous is not my thing. The meeting closes and I trying to get out of there as fast as I can. While running to my car I feel the cold breeze on my knee pits. I hop in the car, only to look into the mirror and find, a black mascara mustache that I so graciously put there when I wiped the tears from the back of my hand. A piece of toilet paper flowing from one of my chin hairs. And of course lipstick not only on one of my teeth, but all of them.
Needless to say, I AM BACK
Sunday, December 28, 2008
Friday, October 3, 2008
I SURE WILL
I love it when you ask your 3 yr old to go potty and he responds " I sure will". Or to get a diaper for Audrey, "I sure will". Being a mom just gets better and better. Well, I should say most days. On the other hand, who ever said that it is no longer the terrible 2's was right. Jaxon has been 3 for a month and our life's have changed. In stead of, I want some milk. It is now, MOM I NEED SOME MILK. I NEED SOME CANDY. I NEED TO CALL SANTA. I NEED IT NOW. Don't get me wrong he his still a sweet little boy. But it is testing my patience. I pray for patience every day and I know that I am being blessed. If you know me I am normally not a patient person.
Todd and I were Shopping at Maceys when Jaxon throws a jar of salsa out of the basket. Need lest to say with glass and salsa every where Jaxon was in time out. And then the poor guy that had to clean it up was a student that Todd had taught. Jaxon loves to drag Audrey around the floor on a blanket. They both just laugh and laugh. Until she was only half on the blanket and got a bad rug burn on the back of her neck. She is one tuff cookie. she was still laughing and having a Blast.
To be continued.........
Todd and I were Shopping at Maceys when Jaxon throws a jar of salsa out of the basket. Need lest to say with glass and salsa every where Jaxon was in time out. And then the poor guy that had to clean it up was a student that Todd had taught. Jaxon loves to drag Audrey around the floor on a blanket. They both just laugh and laugh. Until she was only half on the blanket and got a bad rug burn on the back of her neck. She is one tuff cookie. she was still laughing and having a Blast.
To be continued.........
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
Time just flies when you are having fun!
We are still alive. But going a little crazy. So much has happened this summer. There was Lagoon Day, the Downey fair, finishing our yard, camping at Bear Lake, and of course Jaxon's birthday. I will provide funny updates about our great summer, with a ton of pictures. Now that we are back on our schedule I will be able to blog more often.
For now, Todd is back in school, Jaxon is 3, Audrey is almost sitting up (with the help of the bumbo) and loves her jumper (pictures coming soon). At times I am finding myself pulling my hair out. But only when Jaxon gives Audrey orange juice. I hear the two of them laughing, I look to see what they are laughing at, and Audrey is covered throw-up. More of my hair falls out when, again I hear Audrey laughing and Jaxon telling me that he gave her some licorice and that "mom she really likes it". Again covered in throw-up she looks up at me with a big smile.
stay tuned for more fun times, with the Simpson's
For now, Todd is back in school, Jaxon is 3, Audrey is almost sitting up (with the help of the bumbo) and loves her jumper (pictures coming soon). At times I am finding myself pulling my hair out. But only when Jaxon gives Audrey orange juice. I hear the two of them laughing, I look to see what they are laughing at, and Audrey is covered throw-up. More of my hair falls out when, again I hear Audrey laughing and Jaxon telling me that he gave her some licorice and that "mom she really likes it". Again covered in throw-up she looks up at me with a big smile.
stay tuned for more fun times, with the Simpson's
Friday, May 23, 2008
Trackers, Trains, and Wagons
Jaxon loves trackers, trains, and wagons, not to mention The Simpsons (Homer, Bart, and the whole family). He says the funnest things and is always keeping us laughing. Expect when he gets mad at me, goes upstairs and poops his pants in his new underware. ( It seems to always be when Todd is at school) I was so mad that I thought about leaving him in it. But he kept saying "Sorry Mom, Sorry Mom, with tears in his eyes) My heart couldn't take it. So he got a time out. I asked if we needed to put a diaper back on him. Again his eyes start to swell up and he says "Sorry Mom, Sorry Mom, Mom Jaxon a big boy. (this kid pulls at your heart all day long. If only he wasn't so darn stinking cute. I might be able to follow through with the time outs and.
Todd and I are starting to get things together for our yard. We currently do not have a front or backyard. I am going to post a picture of the forest, so you all can see the weeds that we have to put up with. I am going crazy with no place for jaxon to play. Don't worry, I'll let you all know when we start. And I'll give you plenty of time to take work off. I know that everyone is jumping for joy to come over and help :) I have been trying to talk todd into just hiring someone to do it. He wants to do it himself. Which I am okay with. But a little scared to see the out come. We put up a fence last year, and two panels fell down in a wind storm. I was the worst wind storm here in a long time. So I guess that two panels is not that bad. It's a good thing that he is not here tonight. He might not have wanted me to tell you about the fence. Oh, well. He and Jaxon are at a father son outing. Todd called to tell me that jaxon is scared of the camp fire because of me. I asked what he was talking about, then I remembered. A couple of Sunday's a go I woke up to the smell of gas (and no it was not todd, which was unusual) todd was at a meeting. I thought that we must have had a gas leak. I took the kids over to the neighbors and called the non-emergency phone # for the fire dept . She said that they would have to send someone out to make sure it was not a true gas leak. I then asked if they would not come with their lights and sirens on( If it wasn't a gas leak i didn't want to look like a freak). The lady on the other end said in a stern voice, Mrs Simpson we do have to follow protocol. Needless to say we had a couple of police cars, two of the big fire trucks, and one of those really old fashion fire trucks ( by the look of it, I was really surprised that it even made it over the train tracks. Guess this is what we get for living in a small town). I'll just say that jaxon freaked out, todd was mad that I made a big deal out of it. And the worst part, It was the snow blower that was leaking gas and oil in the garage. SO now my kid is scared to death of, fire, fire trucks, police, and bugs even flies (this is a another story) All the police and firemen were laughing. Todd of course was not.
And I just wanted my kids to be safe. That isn't so bad. Is it?
Well this is all for tonight. Audrey and I are going to sleep. (I am going to sleep on todds side with the new intell-a-gel. better go before he kids me out.)
Todd and I are starting to get things together for our yard. We currently do not have a front or backyard. I am going to post a picture of the forest, so you all can see the weeds that we have to put up with. I am going crazy with no place for jaxon to play. Don't worry, I'll let you all know when we start. And I'll give you plenty of time to take work off. I know that everyone is jumping for joy to come over and help :) I have been trying to talk todd into just hiring someone to do it. He wants to do it himself. Which I am okay with. But a little scared to see the out come. We put up a fence last year, and two panels fell down in a wind storm. I was the worst wind storm here in a long time. So I guess that two panels is not that bad. It's a good thing that he is not here tonight. He might not have wanted me to tell you about the fence. Oh, well. He and Jaxon are at a father son outing. Todd called to tell me that jaxon is scared of the camp fire because of me. I asked what he was talking about, then I remembered. A couple of Sunday's a go I woke up to the smell of gas (and no it was not todd, which was unusual) todd was at a meeting. I thought that we must have had a gas leak. I took the kids over to the neighbors and called the non-emergency phone # for the fire dept . She said that they would have to send someone out to make sure it was not a true gas leak. I then asked if they would not come with their lights and sirens on( If it wasn't a gas leak i didn't want to look like a freak). The lady on the other end said in a stern voice, Mrs Simpson we do have to follow protocol. Needless to say we had a couple of police cars, two of the big fire trucks, and one of those really old fashion fire trucks ( by the look of it, I was really surprised that it even made it over the train tracks. Guess this is what we get for living in a small town). I'll just say that jaxon freaked out, todd was mad that I made a big deal out of it. And the worst part, It was the snow blower that was leaking gas and oil in the garage. SO now my kid is scared to death of, fire, fire trucks, police, and bugs even flies (this is a another story) All the police and firemen were laughing. Todd of course was not.
And I just wanted my kids to be safe. That isn't so bad. Is it?
Well this is all for tonight. Audrey and I are going to sleep. (I am going to sleep on todds side with the new intell-a-gel. better go before he kids me out.)
Thursday, May 22, 2008
10 Things that the cutest 2 yr old has ever done or said..
10. Tells you 20 times a day that he's a "LUCKY BOY" !!
9. Calls you by your first name, instead of mom and dad.
8. Asks you to kiss his owie when you are half asleep, only to find out that their is a booger on his finger , and that it is on your lip.
7. Loves to carry around a pocket size Webster Dictionary, saying that it is his book and when he reads from it (up side down) saying, " church, family, heavenly father, etc). Never putting it down and wanting to take it everywhere.
6. Asked every time when we are in the car if we are going to cross a train track. And when we do having to say loud chug-a-chug-a-chug-a- choo, choo.
5. Telling you that your hair is beautiful.
4. Makes fun of your hair when you wake up, laughing and pointing.
3. Saying "Kimi" and then peeing on the carpet, when he is potty trained.
2. Letting you know when it is time to take a nap.
1. Pouring your can of coke in the cookie mix and saying the "he was just helping, Kim."
9. Calls you by your first name, instead of mom and dad.
8. Asks you to kiss his owie when you are half asleep, only to find out that their is a booger on his finger , and that it is on your lip.
7. Loves to carry around a pocket size Webster Dictionary, saying that it is his book and when he reads from it (up side down) saying, " church, family, heavenly father, etc). Never putting it down and wanting to take it everywhere.
6. Asked every time when we are in the car if we are going to cross a train track. And when we do having to say loud chug-a-chug-a-chug-a- choo, choo.
5. Telling you that your hair is beautiful.
4. Makes fun of your hair when you wake up, laughing and pointing.
3. Saying "Kimi" and then peeing on the carpet, when he is potty trained.
2. Letting you know when it is time to take a nap.
1. Pouring your can of coke in the cookie mix and saying the "he was just helping, Kim."
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